Category: “The Babylon Bee”
- Presenting The Babylon Bee Awards For 2024
- HERESY: Church Passes Out LED Candles For ‘Silent Night’
- ‘What Have I Become?’ Mutters Man In Mirror After Buying Gems In A Mobile Game
- Dad Gently Informs Daughter He Spent Her College Fund On A Single Little Bacon Cheeseburger At Five Guys
- ‘Elon On The Shelf’ Installed In All Congressional Offices To Remind Lawmakers To Be Efficient
- Members Of Congress Explain They Need Pay Raises To Keep Up With The Inflation They Caused
- Husbands Breathe Sigh Of Relief As Amazon Workers Go On Strike
- Ignorant Boomer Tries To Pay With Cash
- 13 Most Surprising Things In The New Spending Bill
- Elementary School Christmas Performance Going On Tenth Grueling Minute
- Newborn Starting To Suspect There’s No Milk In This Pacifier
- RFK Jr Advises Children To Leave Out 8 Strips of Bacon And A Bowl of Beef Tallow For Santa This Year
- Worship Leader Trying To Decide Which Beautiful Christmas Hymn To Butcher This Year
- Husband Helpfully Points Out All Historical Inaccuracies In Wife’s Favorite Period Drama
- Reminder: Mail Your Christmas Packages Via USPS Today If You Want Them To Arrive By Christmas 2037
- Hollywood Celebrities Terrified That If Trump Deports Illegal Immigrants They May Have To Start Watching Their Own Kids
- Biden Calls For New Gun Laws He Can Pardon His Son For Breaking
- Drones Turn Out To Be Elaborate Gender Reveal Party
- In Historic First, Airline Hires Straight Male Flight Attendant
- Historians In Year 3400 Still Struggling To Figure Out Why Beyonce Was Famous
- LifeAlert Buttons To Be Installed At Every Congressional Seat
- Biden Issues Pardon To The Dark Lord Sauron
- 8 Glaring Historical Errors in ‘The Chosen’
- American Obesity Rate Falls Thanks To Resumed Bullying Of Fat Kids
- National Debt Paid Off With The Change In Dan Crenshaw’s Swear Jar
- ‘Elon Is Controlling Trump!’ Complain People Controlling Biden
- Adorable: Trump And Musk Debut Matching Christmas Pajamas
- Representatives Upset Spending Bill Killed By The People They Represent
- Civilization VII To Include ‘Bidenomics’ Tech Tree Upgrade Where Inflation Ruins Everything And Eggs Go Up To $12
- 8 Reasons Congress Deserves Raises
- Disgusting: New Woke Superman Movie Features Guy Wearing Underwear Over His Pants
- Congress Proposes New Law Banning Anyone From Reading Spending Bill Until It’s Passed
- Congress Warns Failure To Pass Spending Bill Might Delay Destruction Of The Country
- 7 Ways ‘Die Hard’ Points Us To Jesus
- Newsom Says With Another $25 Billion He Could Double Homelessness By 2030
- FBI Assures Nation Drones Just U.S. Government Spying On Its Own Citizens
- Newly Discovered Scroll Reveals Fourth Wise Man Who Brought Baby Jesus A Priceless Lego Millennium Falcon
- 12 Democrats Boycotting Trump’s Inauguration
- Too Far? Biden Pardons All Bicyclists
- Clarence Thomas Wows Audiences With Starring Role In ‘Annie’
- 12 Most Common Questions Wives Ask During Movies
- Powerful: This Broadway Production Called A Little Retarded Girl Up On Stage
- Family Enjoying Annual Holiday Tradition Called ‘Everyone Gets Violently Ill And Takes Turns Annihilating The Bathroom Ho Ho Ho!’
- Unclear If Pianist Total Beginner Or Professional Jazz Player
- Drone Problem Solved After They Try Flying Over Texas
- ‘That’s Really Interesting, Thanks For The Great Idea I’d Never Thought Of Before,’ Says New Mom To Person Telling Her To Sleep When The Baby Sleeps
- On This Day In History: St. Nicholas Punches Arius For Claiming ‘Die Hard’ Is Not A Christmas Movie
- Nancy Pelosi Hospitalized With Dangerously Low Blood Alcohol Level
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