The following article, The WNBA’s Absurd Sex Toy Saga Exposed, was first published on The Black Sphere.

The Women’s National Basketball Association (WNBA) was already a hotbed of controversy—think subsidized survival, equal pay gripes, and Caitlin Clark snubs. But 2025 has cranked the absurdity to eleven.

Enter the green dildos: neon sex toys hurled onto courts in a bizarre trend that’s racked up at least five incidents, multiple arrests, and a link to a cryptocurrency scam. What started as a potential TikTok challenge or frat-boy stunt has morphed into a safety hazard, with fans ejected, bans issued, and charges flying faster than the toys themselves.

It kicked off on July 29 during an Atlanta Dream vs. Golden State Valkyries game in College Park, Georgia. Late in the fourth quarter, a green dildo landed on the court, halting play and sparking viral memes.

Three days later, another hit the hardwood in Chicago during a Valkyries-Sky matchup.

Then Los Angeles, where one nearly tripped Indiana Fever’s Sophie Cunningham.

Phoenix saw two more: one during a Mercury game on August 5, thrown by 18-year-old Kaden Lopez, who allegedly pulled it from his sweater and lobbed it into the crowd, hitting a man and his 9-year-old niece.

And just yesterday, another in Phoenix.

Authorities aren’t messing around. In Atlanta, 23-year-old Delbert Carver was arrested August 2, charged with disorderly conduct, public indecency, and criminal trespass after confessing it was a ‘joke to go viral.’

He was released on bond, but his case is pending.

Lopez got cuffed in Phoenix for similar antics.

A second Phoenix suspect followed.

The WNBA’s response? A stern statement prioritizing safety: “Objects of any kind thrown onto the court… will be immediately ejected and face a minimum one-year ban in addition to being subject to arrest.”

Really. Don’t do the patrons any favors! A more fitting punishment would be getting banned from any games featuring Caitlin Clark. More on that in a bit.

But peel back the layers, and it’s not just immaturity—it’s crypto-fueled idiocy. A group behind ‘Green Dildo Coin’ (yes, that’s real) claimed responsibility, launching their token July 7, weeks before the first toss.

They’re hyping it as a meme coin, turning disruptions into marketing. One X post bragged about the viral boost.

Players? Not amused. Sky’s Elizabeth Williams slammed it as “super disrespectful” and called for maturity.

New York’s Isabelle Harrison tweeted it’s “dangerous,” not funny.

Even Angel Reese quipped on X, blaming a teammate in jest.

This fiasco spotlights the WNBA’s deeper woes.

The league’s a Leftist stronghold, preaching empowerment while relying on NBA subsidies—losing $10 million yearly as of 2022.

Equal pay demands? Laughable when average attendance hovers at 6,500 (Caitlin adjusted) vs. NBA’s 18,000. The WNBA experienced a 48% increase in attendance after Caitlin Clark and a 100% increase in GAF (Give a F*ck).

Add this datapoint to your calculations. NBA tickets range from $95 to $600, while WNBA tickets average $47. For the record, when Caitlin Clark plays, the average WNBA ticket price jumps to $106.

Salaries: $120K average vs. $8M. The NBA gets the fat TV and cable contracts, and baby sister tags along.

Women’s Movement? More like Men’s Wallet Dependence.

Worse, Caitlin Clark: the phenom igniting the league with 9.9 million average viewers per game in 2024 gets treated like she stole one of the Black chick’s husband.

She’s met with obvious racism (as a white star in a Black-dominated league) and sexism snubs. Rivals resent her spotlight, prioritizing dogma over dollars. Meritocracy? Buried under woke rubble. Clark’s success could mean paydays for all, but nah—let’s hate the golden goose.

And the product without Caitlin? Subpar—slower pace, fewer dunks, stagnant non-Clark viewership under 5 million. A good high school boys basketball team could easily beat these women. So you can imagine how the trannies feel.

Final data point:

Revenue: $200M vs. NBA’s $10B.

Humility time: acknowledge the gap, amp marketing, capitalize on Clark.

As for the dildos—your theory nails it: trans “We’re COMING!” warning, frat prank, or now, crypto hustle. TikTok challenge? Absolutely, with #DildoDunk trending. The league should flip it: sanitize and giveaway as “Buzzer Beaters” for under-actioned players. Or auction for charity—fund anti-crypto education. Donald Trump Jr. even memed his dad tossing one.

This is the WNBA’s identity crisis: feminist facade on male funding, punishing stars amid pettiness, now dodging sex toys. Fix: Embrace merit, boost product, laugh at chaos. Otherwise, arenas stay half-empty, save for flying phalluses. Caitlin deserves better—so do fans. If green dildos are the highlight, the league’s in deeper trouble than a crypto crash.

The real dildos are the Leftists who refuse to see this for what it is.

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