Attention ladies and gentlemen: The words “ladies” and “gentlemen” are henceforth forbidden as thoughtcrime in Airstrip One.

The English Folk Dance and Song Society (EFDSS) is attempting to make centuries-old traditions more “inclusive”.

The charity, which is backed by the Arts Council, has created guidance that tells teachers and those hosting group dances to use “gender-free language”.

Barn and ceilidh dances often have defined male and female roles, with the caller, who guides participants through complex steps, using terms such as “men and women”, “ladies and gentlemen” or “boys and girls”.

The society’s guidance on inclusion and accessibility states that this vocabulary could offend “minority genders” and should be dropped to avoid anyone being “misgendered on the dance floor”.

Everything must center on sexually psychotic moonbattery, including English folk dancing.

There are not many ladies or gentlemen among moonbats anyway, so the words won’t be missed when ideological homogeneity has been achieved. As for folk dancing, it reeks of tradition and therefore will not be permitted in utopia — even if liberals might find men in skirts appealing.

On a tip from Steve T.

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